To most, 30 is a number. To some, I’m sure it’s nothing. However, to me, it marks a whole new beginning for a decade’s worth of opportunities, mistakes, successes, growth, and shift.
I did not think my 20’s would go that damn fast, but, here we are. January. 8 months till the number shifts upward one more number.
It’s interesting to notice that I am journaling more often, and posting my thoughts. Almost like it’s 2004 and Facebook, Twitter, and Myspace are brand new shadows leaking in the internet’s blinders. It’s nice. I smile at the thought of the return to a more casual, yet, judgement free space to express my thoughts. That’s a plus.
So far, the new Years Resolutions, well, they’re a success.
Anyways. My 20’s brought about countless opportunities and moments of pure joy, and, well, downfalls, too.
I traveled to LA for season 18 of the Voice, lived in Alaska, traveled to England, Iceland, Canada, and over 20 states, got married, divorced, and than came out of the closet, released 9 albums, wow…
The biggest joy, well, meeting my soul mate, Mateo. Finding the love I was always meant to find. Had to really battle through what I thought was real, to eventually discover the truth, my own truth, the man I truly am at this point of my life.
It took decades to come out of the closet as a gay man, but, now, well? I don’t feel afraid anymore. I don’t let religious power or prejudice get in my way of living authentically. Nor should you.
I made some enemies along the way due to my negative habits. Glad to have quit drinking. Grateful to be alive today. I give my apologies to those who felt that hurt. I was learning to find myself.
I wish you well on your journey.
I lost my uncle, my dad, best friend Tony, my loving aunt Mary, and others who meant most, yet, I know now to live a positive path in their good memory.
I could go on describing 10 years worth of moments, yet, I just want to reflect on the present moment. How I can be better today. Continue on my path for my professional life, be a good partner for my future husband, and write music from the soul.
Thank you for reading. If any do come across my words. I was once someone who had a vanity problem with doing content, now, I just want to leave my legacy, share my hiccups and successes along the way, and have something for family and friends and friendly strangers to discover.
Stay groovy and know you matter.
Tony Gebhard 